Blogging seems to be the thing to do these days, so I figured I’d try one.
My wife and I are on the cusp of a great adventure, and I’d like 1 central place to document our story and record where God leads us and how He provides. Here’s our story [not all of it, just since Jan., 2013]:
My wife and I have been praying with some good friends for about the last 2 years on a weekly basis. The usual content of the prayers goes something like this: “Jesus, HELP US! HELP US LOVE YOU MORE!!! WE WANT TO LOVE YOU WITH ALL OF OUR HEART, SOUL, MIND AND STRENGTH, YET WE KEEP GETTING DISTRACTED BY SO MANY OTHER SHINY THINGS!!! HEEEEELLLLPPPP!!!!”
Lately, my wife and I have been wondering outlaid about our approach to God, life, parenting, finances, the Church, America, and our role in it all. We’ve realized that for us, being a “Christian” has meant: being good, trying to stay away from evil, being helpful, owning a house, having a job, taking kids to events, and in general trying to be a good person. What we’ve been wondering is, “Is there more to this?” In most respects, we act just like ‘the world’, except we try to sin less. Is this the greatest testimony we have to offer Jesus? Is this loving him with all our heart, soul, mind and strength? Is this entering into the Father’s love?
If only God is good, then truly it can’t be our job to be good. It’s impossible. Our job is to have faith, and it takes very little of it with all of our current comfort and security. On top of that, the cares of this world tend to crowd out any love or passion we might have for Christ. We’re often exhausted for each other, much less for Christ.
Our daily schedule consists of: 5 am alarm. press snooze a bunch of times. get up between 5:30-6 to pray and read a little. 6-7 wake up kids, get ready for school, pack lunches, ect. 7-5/6. work. 6-8pm play with kids, eat dinner, take kids to any activities they might have, or work out. 8-9 bed time for kids. 9-10 talk w/ teenager, homework table. 10-11: pillow talk or pass out. Repeat.
To the point, is there a deeper love to be had in Jesus? If so, could it be that we are not experiencing it because we have so many other things that we must tend to? To have a house and car take a lot of money. To make a lot of money takes a lot of time. To have a lot of time for money means we have less time to grow in the Love of Jesus.
The thought entered our brain: “What if we sold it all? What if we sold everything, got out of debt, and gave any extra to the poor?” What could life look like? This thought really excited us. Not because we think jobs and homes are evil. Because we are at a point where something has to give. We are time broke.
We cannot serve both God and money. The 2 are in conflict with each other. We have to make a choice: either make more room for God, or become content with the amount of God we have now.
We are beginning an adventure. We don’t know what lies ahead, but we know that Jesus is the Way. We desperately want to love Him to our full capacity. We have contacted a realtor to explore the possibility of selling our house. We don’t have a clue what’s going to happen. We trust that Jesus is the Way.
We’d like to eventually move back to the city and do urban missions, but we honestly have no idea what God has in store for us. This move is not to prove or accomplish anything. We are simply at a place where we feel the Holy Spirit leading us in this direction.
This blog is basically going to be an online journal, cataloging our story. It may turn out that God shuts the door on selling, and wants us to stay here. In which case, we’ll have to find other ways to minimize debt and create more time for Him. The point is: we want to live crazy for God. I don’t want to look back on my life in 40 years, and offer God a house and well behaved kids. I want my heart fully engaged in His Kingdom work. I want all that He has for me. I want to hear, “well done, good and faithful servant”.